SEXY DIET

If you were to make a list of all the things you’d love to provide for your children, what would your list look like? Many people spend every waking hour stressing and worrying about how they can provide this and that for their children, but I want to propose that the BEST gift you can give your child is the ability to be happy and enjoy life.

Most of you reading this are probably thinking, “Yes, absolutely. That would be my greatest wish for my child – for them to be happy and to enjoy life fully everyday.” What goes wrong then between what we genuinely want to give our children and the actual reality of what they get from us?

Statistics show that more and more adults and young adults are popping some type of drug in order to make it through the day. Approximately 100 million prescriptions for Valium and Librium are filled annually in the United States alone!

The plain fact is that most of us do not know how to help our children learn how to enjoy life because we have not learned that simple secret ourselves! We can’t teach what we don’t know.

Here enlies the problem; in order to provide our children with our greatest wish we must be able to model what we are attempting to teach.

It is essential to show our children a portrait of a person who appreciates the small things, the magnificence of nature and the beauty of being quiet with ourselves. It is also essential to show our children a portrait of a happy, loving, communicative relationship, not only with our child’s mother or father, but with ourselves.

Pretend you had a video camera following you around all day. What would that video look like? Would it show you:

* rushing around from one activity to another?
* barking commands?
* constantly talking or having noise around like the radio or TV?
* speaking quickly, in a hurried, worried, stressed or anxious tone?
* constantly providing or being the entertainment for your child?

OR

* living life slowly?
* Laughing and smiling a lot?
* Enjoying moments of silence, not feeling the need to say anything or ask any questions?
* Enjoying alone time while your child enjoys their own?
* Doing an activity with your child that you BOTH enjoy?

Maybe you feel quite good about how your daily life is being lived but recognize that the words or phrases you use could be more positive. For example, you may use the word “Naughty” or phrases like, “Oh, come on!” when something isn’t working as you’d like it to, or “Things never seem to go right!”. These phrases can definitely be picked up on by our children and eventually, become their beliefs to live by.

If we TRULY want to raise happy kids who enjoy life to the fullest, then the first place to start in teaching this is with ourselves.

Right now, take stock of life and think about the speed at which you live, the tone that exists in your home and the messages that are being shared. Once you have a clear view, pat yourself on the back for all the amazing, loving things you do and then make it a priority to work on the things you feel need changing – it will make all the difference to not only your life but your child’s life as well.

Erin Kurt, B.Ed, spent 16 years as a teacher and nanny around the world. Now, she applies her expertise as a parenting expert and author of Juggling Family Life. You can learn more about Erin and her simple, loving parenting method, and subscribe to her weekly parenting tips e-zine at ErinParenting.com.

“Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.” – Aristotle

“Life wasn’t all too bad really, but I wasn’t that happy either,” recalls Henrik Edberg, creator of The Positivity Blog and author of The 7 Timeless Habits of Happiness. “I think the problem was that I didn’t understand myself or the world around that well. I didn’t understand what I needed to do to create a happier life for myself.” Well, now he does:

1. Choose Happiness

“Most people are about as happy as they make their minds up to be.” – Abraham Lincoln

Misery and happiness aren’t about external circumstances; they are a conscious choice. “You choose each day what you focus on and how you interpret your reality,” Edberg writes. So instead of seeing the world and yourself “through a lens smudged by negativity”, you consciously choose to look outwards and inwards “through a lens brightened by positivity”. This could involve being grateful for what you have, spending time in an environment of happiness with people who lift you up, and choosing positive information such as personal development reading over negative information like endless news reports.

For more, see The Gift of Gratitude and Thoughts on Happiness

2. Get Your Physical Fundamentals in Shape

“Those who think they have no time for healthy eating will sooner or later have to find time for illness.” – Edward Stanley

“How we manage our body has a huge, huge impact on our thoughts, emotions and everything that happens in our personal world,” Edberg explains. This is why we need to eat healthy, exercise regularly, and get enough sleep.

For more, see No More Stress: Part One and The Secret of Dreams by Yacki Raizizun

3. Create an Action Habit

“Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action.” – Benjamin Disraeli

It’s been said that the only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. We need to stop waiting for other people to solve our problems and take action in order to see results. Use a morning ritual, do things even if you don’t feel like it, and take responsibility for the process, not the potential results.

For more, see Get the Edge and The Seven Habits: Part Two

4. Be Here Now

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly.” – Buddha

Guess what? The past and future don’t exist. They are simply thoughts arising in the present moment. By focusing on the present, we can improve our social skills (no more thinking of what to say when you should be listening to what’s being said), improve our creativity (no more worrying about what others will think of our work), and release stress. And by focusing on what’s in front of us (through practices like guided meditation and breathing techniques), we also learn to appreciate our world more.

For more, see Focus by Leo Babauta (Part 5 of 5) and Carpe Diem!

5. Help and Make Other People Happy

“If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help someone else.” – Chinese Proverb

“When you do the right thing and make people happy you feel good about yourself,” Edberg points out. “When you make someone else happy you can sense, see, feel and hear it. And that happy feeling flows back to you.” Give value by bringing a positive attitude to your interactions, giving useful advice, or offering a listening ear to someone who needs it. And let’s not forget about smiles and hugs! Even though people may not always appreciate what you do or feel compelled to reciprocate, you should still persist and feel good for doing so.

For more, see People Policy and Relationship Review

6. Do What You Love to Do

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Albert Schweitzer

The fact that you’re working at a full-time job doesn’t mean you can’t (or shouldn’t) pursue your passions on the side. “There is always time,” Edberg explains. Things won’t always be great but the work won’t feel as hard nor will you have to force yourself to perform. Spend some time exploring and asking questions to bring clarity. Most importantly, remember to add value to the world and not simply to yourself. “By using your talents and skills and at the same time helping people and giving them value in some way you can find the opportunities to both do what you love and to earn money to support yourself from it.”

For more, see Seven Keys to Discovering Your Passion by Jonathan Mead and Success Built to Last

7. Let Go

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

So much of our suffering is caused by our clinging. We hold on to who we are and what we believe to the point where we must always be right. We hold on to things that are impermanent and things we think will make us happy even though they never really do. Sometimes we simply need to accept things as they are and then let them go. We need to stop trying to control everything and stop fussing over things that don’t even matter. And while it may be hard at first, it gets easier as time passes. Our happiness depends on it.

For more, see You’re Worth It! and No More Stress: Part Three

Conclusion

Edberg admits that this book won’t solve all your problems or make you happy all the time. But he firmly believes that with some effort and persistence, focusing on one aspect at a time, you can start to see major differences in your life as was the case for him. What do you think? Are there any other habits of happiness you would add? Please share your thoughts in the comments!

As an alternative to posting the hackneyed advice of self-proclaimed life coaches and storytellers (e.g. Tony Robbins, Tim Ferriss, etc…), I thought I’d collect and share advice from real people in the mySomeday community that achieved real goals.  In the past, they admitted to having issues with finishing what they started.  ”So, what was different this time?”, I asked.  Although they all agreed that building a detailed step-by-step Plan was essential, each had a unique aspect to that Plan that kept them motivated.  Here are their tips.

1.  Break It Down

Maia was determined to get out of credit card debt but was daunted and occasionally paralyzed by the enormity of the goal.  She decided to break down the path into clear, achievable steps and discovered that checking off smaller to-dos generated real momentum.  These small flashes of progress kept her head in the game and allowed her to continue to believe that the goal would someday be reality.  Maia is convinced that taking the time to break down the path into incremental steps made the difference for her.

2.  Picture It

Globehound turned 40 and decided it was time to go back to the future and get back in shape.  To stay motivated, he strategically placed unflattering pictures of himself in various places next to images of people he’d like to emulate.  This ‘in your face’ approach worked wonders.  Whenever he felt lazy or was eyeing that bag of Doritos, he’d take a quick look at the pictures and the urge was squashed.  Now that he’s back in shape, he posted before and after pictures of himself as a constant reminder of a place he does not wish to return.  Globehound was adamant, this visual anchor located in a prominent place had a profound impact on his ability to stick to his plan.

3.  Broadcast It

Christine wanted to change careers.  She knew it for a long time but it wasn’t until she shared this goal with friends and family that she started to make real strides.  Knowing that others were watching and rooting for her proved to be just the motivation she needed to continue to check off steps in her plan.  She used the ‘Share’ option on the  Someday page and broadcast her intentions to her Facebook Wall.  It profoundly affected the accountability factor by adding social pressure and expectations to the mix and Christine says it was just what she needed to make the move from consulting to fashion.

4.  Make It About Something Bigger Than You

A4S4L4 had run a half-marathon before but she was feeling a bit unmotivated this time around.  Someone suggested that she make someone else the beneficiary of her efforts.  She built a plan to run a half-marathon and included a charitable partner.   Knowing that her efforts would do good beyond personal satisfaction gave her a real sense of necessity.   If she was in a rut, she would visit the charity’s website and suddenly her laziness felt insignificant.   She claimed that adding this one element shifted her entire perspective and gave her massive amounts of motivation.

Got any stories or motivational tips?  Please share.  We’re always looking to incorporate new elements into our site to increase the motivation and accountability factors.

In ‘Why We Get Fat: And What to Do About It‘, Gary Tabues spends a lot of time debunking the theory that to lose weight we need to exercise more.

He details many studies conducted on unsuspecting laboratory rats, of which I’ll spare you the details. But there was one study that really resonated.

Danish researchers took a group of sedentary, overweight men and women and over 18 months trained them to run a marathon. The findings were very telling. Of the men, there was an average weight loss of something like a few pounds but the women in the study averaged no change to their weight.

Imagine running 26.2 miles (42km) and not losing anything?

This is consistent with my own experience.

A few years ago, I decided to run the Sydney marathon. At the height of my training I was running over 55 miles a week. And while I felt a lot fitter and had more energy, my appetite was enormous. So even though I tried to eat a normal amount of food, I couldn’t help myself. In the end my weight stayed about the same.

But even if exercise isn’t going to solve your weight-loss problems, there are many other benefits to getting off the couch. So don’t cancel that gym membership. Just yet.

1. Increases your energy levels
The more energy you use, the more it feels like you have.

2. Improves the quality of your sleep.
Exercise not only helps you get to sleep more quickly, it also improves the quality of your sleep.

3. Helps combat chronic disease.
Exercise helps improve your blood pressure and cholesterol levels which decreases your chances of suffering from things like heart disease, type II diabetes and certain cancers. Exercise has also been linked with a delayed onset of dementia.

4. Improves your mood.
Exercise promotes positive brain chemistry which means you’ll feel better.

5. Provides relief from anxiety and mild depression.
My Dad has suffered from depression most of his life. These days thankfully, he has it under control. And while the medication helps, he says when he is walking every day he feels so much better than if he isn’t.

6. Improves your sex life.
Both men and women experience more enhanced arousal when they are more physically fit.

7. Makes food taste better.
My boyfriend is Irish and he is always saying that ‘hunger is a tasty sauce’. There’s nothing like physical activity to stimulate your appetite. Well, apart from point number 6.

The fish trap exists because of the fish. Once you’ve gotten the fish you can forget the trap. The rabbit snare exists because of the rabbit. Once you’ve gotten the rabbit, you can forget the snare. Words exist because of meaning. Once you’ve gotten the meaning, you can forget the words. Where can I find a man who has forgotten words so I can talk with him?”
— Zhuangzi – 300 BC

Success begins in the mind. You need to set your mind to do something if you want to achieve anything. You need to set a fish trap to catch fish.

Modern motivational gurus tell us to dream big, and to have a “can do” attitude. In The Secret Rhonda Byrne tells us that everything is possible.

We are told that we need to set ambitious long term goals, and clear short term targets. Just as the greyhound runs faster when chasing the mechanical rabbit, people are more motivated when pursuing identifiable targets.

If we achieve these goals we feel good about ourselves. Few things make us as happy as performing a difficult task well, and doing something useful.

What is more, making up our minds to do something makes us healthier and happier, regardless of our age, according to Harvard psychologist Ellen J. Langer, in her recent interesting book Mindfulness.

Langer warns about the dangers of limiting our opportunities by adhering to preconceived conceptions. She refers to the “destructive state of mindlessness.”

But reality has a habit of putting obstacles in the way of our dreams. We are not going to win every race. We may travel a long way down a road, only to find that we cannot quite achieve our original objective. If we only focus on the final goal, we can become uptight. Not only may this affect our chances of success, it makes us less likely to enjoy our journey.

In fact relaxed mindlessness has its benefits. Familiar thoughts and habits help us cope with the new experiences that we face in life. It is not practical to judge every new situation from scratch. Preconceived ideas are comforting, and useful.

Whether at work, or playing sports, or learning a language, we cannot constantly second-guess ourselves. We need to trust our “instincts”, which are mostly not instincts at all, but habits, the result of repetition and experience.

Life is not a short dog race, but a long journey with many detours. if we are too focused on chasing the mechanical rabbit and worried about short term outcomes, we may miss the enjoyment of every rich moment in our lives. If we relax, we are more likely to continue in our projects and acquire experience, knowledge and important life skills.

We should not allow ourselves to become disappointed if our achievements do not match our dreams. We should seek to enjoy what we are experiencing and achieving. This does not mean overstating the level of our achievements in some kind of empty assertion of our own self-esteem. It just means being satisfied with what are and what we have.

If need to combine the mindfulness of the motivational gurus with an effortless appreciation of life, every single day.

The Sage is occupied with the unspoken
and acts without effort.
Teaching without verbosity,
producing without possessing,
creating without regard to result,
claiming nothing,
the Sage has nothing to lose.

Dao de jing – 600 BC

Keeping a busy family on track can take the skills of a juggler, the planning of a master strategist and the organization skills of an army supply corps officer. But a simple family communication station can make keeping track of who needs to be where much easier.

A family communication station is the one place where all the information lives. It has information on schedules, shopping lists and events, as well as a place to check and leave phone messages.

Choosing A Location

The communication station should be located in a central place where everyone in the family will see it every day. It is also very helpful to have the station within sight of the main phone so that messages can be left easily, and schedules checked while on the phone.

The kitchen is a good candidate for this. We keep our station on the back of the main door. If you don’t want the information out in plain sight, you can always put it inside a cupboard door.

Putting Together the Station

The Calendar

The main portion of the communication station is the calendar. While some families with older children can use a completely electronic schedule, families with small children or those who don’t live and breathe technology will benefit from a central paper calendar.

The calendar will have a place for each person to record their events and commitments. You will want to select a calendar with lots of room in each box, or perhaps one with a column for each family member. Some people will color code the events for each person, making it easy to see at a glance who has commitments on a given day.

A calendar that runs from September through the following year can be useful for those with school-aged children. That way you can enter dates at the beginning of the school year and not have to think about it at the end of the calendar year.

Each family member, if old enough, should place their commitments on the calendar. I have heard some people tell their older children, “If it’s not on the calendar, it’s not happening.” Meaning no rides, transportation or other support for non-listed events. One missed practice or birthday party and the kids will start keeping up their calendar.

A Place For Documents

Another component to the scheduling aspect of the family center is the place to keep related documents. These would be the lists of dates sent home at the beginning of a sport season, the school calendar, or party invitations. This gives these important papers a place to live, and where you will be able to find them.

My calendar has a pocket at the back to keep these items, but a simple manilla envelope would do as well.

A Cork Board

A cork board, with plenty of push pins, is useful for handling information you need to refer to for a short time. Receipts, party invitations and reading lists live on mine. The cork board is also a good place to leave phone messages, although I cannot speak to that, since my family doesn’t do messages.

A White Board Shopping List

Having a running shopping list where everyone can see it is a good way to keep track of things that need to be purchased…before it becomes a critical matter Ask your family to add things to these lists when they are needed.

Warning: leaving a shopping list out where children can get to it may result in junk food being added to the shopping list in a chance to bypass parental approval.

A List of Commonly-Used Phone Numbers

Even though the most-used phone numbers will be committed to memory (yours or your phone’s), it is still good to have numbers available should you need them. This list of numbers should contain the home phone number, parent’s work phone numbers, school numbers and the numbers of trusted neighbors and friends.

After putting together our family communication station, we stopped forgetting to purchase needed items and our schedules became more manageable. Do you have any way to make family communication easier? Share below!

Recently, we looked at “Why Fear is Your Friend,” and learned that Fear can guide you towards what’s important for you, motivate you to take action to improve your odds, and you give you a rush. This week, we discuss why Sadness is your friend. OK, you probably think that idea is nuts. Who wants to be Sad? Well, OK, I get that, Sadness sometimes feels bad, but I want you to get that like Fear, Sadness can be a good friend.

“All well and good, Master Yoda,” you say, “but how does that work?”

First, Sadness is about losing something you care about, whether that’s a loved one, a job, or a football game…so, Sadness  shows you what you care about (because some people honestly don’t know, and that’s, well, SAD!)  Would you feel Sadness if your girlfriend / boyfriend left? The answer tells you how attached you are to this person. How Sad would you feel if you lost your job? You see where this is going.

Along the same lines, experiencing the Sadness of loss helps us to appreciate what we still have. Losing a loved one, while extremely Sad and painful, can be the kick in the pants we need to mend the fences, reach out, or otherwise make the best of the relationships and opportunities we still have. Funerals are painful and gut-wrenching occasions, and they are great for bringing people back together, burying old conflicts, healing wounds, but it only works if you show up and feel the Sadness and let it bring you together with the others there.  One who can’t bear Sadness will tend to shy away from love, commitment, and real passion, in order to avoid grief, and that’s an empty life.

Similarly, losing a job can help you appreciate that you still have your health. Losing your health can bring loved ones together. Losing money can help you to focus on what really matters to you, your values, your sense of mission, your spirituality.

Lastly, Sadness has authenticity to it. Grieving has a way of slowing you down and bringing you back to the moment. It forces you to let go of your worries about your to-do list and next quarter’s numbers and your fast-paced life and really be with yourself, your feelings and the people around you. This is important today because we can get so lost in our smart phones and emails and plans and lose sight of people, relationships, and dreams.

So, this week’s bottom line is that Sadness  shows you what you care about, Sadness helps us to appreciate what we have, and Sadness requires us to be authentic. This is the kind of friend who can help you to stay grounded and real, to honor what’s important and let go of what’s not, and we all need that kind of friend. 

If you get in your car in Los Angeles to drive to New York, do you just pull out of your driveway and start down the road? Or do you get a map and plan your route? The answer is obvious – careful planning pays off. So if your goal is to become fit, lean and strong it’s important to know exactly what you need to do to reach this goal.  Here are some valuable tips to include in any plan which will help you arrive at your goal safely and efficiently.

Tip #1: Be Alert For Opportunities All Day Long

Focus on becoming stronger because there are myriad opportunities throughout the day to strengthen your body. As simple an effort as walking up the stairs to the third floor, rather than taking an elevator, will eventually produce a noticeable effect. Yes, weights lifting, exercise machines and structured sessions are powerful – but so are simple activities carried out every day.

Tip #2: Rest Is Just As Important As Exercise

Make certain you value and allow rest and recovery time. Many believe that if an intense workout feels good and will build muscle quickly, then the smart thing to do is to exercise even more. Muscle builds when exercise tears the muscle down, because it recovers as newer, stronger muscle. Without that recovery time, your muscles absolutely cannot increase in size or strength. Beginners usually start with three workouts per week and the duration and frequency can increase as they grow in strength and power but your body will respond more quickly and more dramatically if allowed to rest during strenuous activities.

Tip #3: What’s “Best” Is What You Will Persist In Doing

There is a constant and ongoing war among fitness experts about whether free weights or weight machines are superior. As far as you are concerned, whatever works best for you is the right choice. If you love competing with the weights on a machine then by all means choose that option. If you despise machines, but eagerly grab that set of dumbbells, then go for it. There is no point whatsoever in choosing exercises that you hate and won’t stick with, no matter what the ‘experts’ say.

Tip #4: You Didn’t Arrive At Your Current Condition Overnight

If you’re flabby and overweight – in other words, totally dissatisfied with the condition of your body – always remember that you didn’t get there overnight. In other words, impatience is a huge mistake. It requires years of neglect and misuse to create problems in your body and it will take some time to repair them. Exercising for a week and then quitting because there are no visible changes is foolish and short sighted. Not only that, but more failure will further erode your confidence and increase the sad condition of your body. You can drastically shorten the time it takes to achieve superb conditioning by using wisdom and discipline but you won’t see changes by 5PM on the first day.

Tip #5: “Compound” Exercises Are More Efficient

Consider that “compound” exercises will get results faster than those exercises that use only one muscle or one muscle group at a time. Yes, your abs may be a disgrace but focusing only on an ab machine won’t pay the dividends of full body exercises. And always remember that exercises which work multiple muscle groups will build fitness much faster – and that’s what we all want, isn’t it?

Tip #6: Don’t Exercise Mindlessly

Don’t exercise of mindlessly. If you pay close attention to your muscles and your body while working out, your results will be much more powerful. On the surface, that doesn’t seem to make sense. But famous, skilled athletes and bodybuilders have stated time and again that they can literally direct their muscles as they see fit.

Tip #7: Natural Sleep = Health and A Fit Body

Get as much ‘natural’ sleep as possible, meaning that drugs and sleeping pills interfere with the natural repair of the body that occurs every night. When we sleep, growth hormone, or HGH. is released into our bodies. HGH stimulates healthy growth, cell repair and the regeneration which is necessary for muscle development. Growth hormone is naturally produced by the body and many athletic scandals have occurred because athletes were building their bodies with the use of artificial HGH. Synthetic growth hormone, even when legal and prescribed by a doctor, can have dangerous side effects. You want to maximize your production naturally and this is done while we’re asleep.

Tip #8: Pepperoni Pizza Is NOT The Perfect Diet Food (Sorry!)

The perfect diet for an athlete or body builder centers around proteins, certain fats that include essential fatty acids (EFAs) and complex carbohydrates like vegetables, fruits and whole grains. Most fitness experts recommend eating multiple small meals rather than three larger ones. This keeps the metabolism working constantly and is less likely to result in fat or overweight.

Tip #9: Water, Water and More Water

Drink lots and lots of water. Water keeps your muscles hydrated which makes them work more efficiently and helps them recover more rapidly. It’s important to know that soft drinks, tea and coffee generally dehydrate the body so don’t assume they are helping your muscles. They’re not.

Superlative fitness requires self-discipline and long term dedication to your goal. Anyone who is going to make this kind of serious commitment naturally wants to reach their goal as quickly as possible and to do this we must be efficient. Following these rules will speed you to your ideal body as quickly as possible.

One of the top issues in homes today is one where parents are completely frustrated at how picky or fussy their children are at mealtimes. Luckily, there is a very easy solution to this problem.

Meal times should and can be one of the most precious rituals in any family’s home. It’s a time when everyone’s schedules go out the window and you just sit together eating, catching up on each other’s days and enjoying one another’s company.

If your meal times are not like this then let’s have a look at some possible reasons why, along with an appropriate solution for each. And keep in mind…some of these tricks may work on adults, too!

1) Your family doesn’t actually make meal times a priority ie: breakfast or dinner

Solution: If I told you that there is ALWAYS some way your family could sit down and enjoy a meal together at least 3 times a week, what would you say? If you simply cannot see how, then rethink the following:

* Wake up, job start and/or end times
* Location of where you work or live
* Certain scheduled activities that are always interfering.

You CAN do this. Take a no-excuses approach to making it happen.

2) Your kids only want chicken nuggets or sweet things.

Solution: If you do not provide junk food, your children will not have the option of eating it. If you you provide good food and they don’t want it that night, use a consistent rule that they must try it. 75% of the time, they’ll say, “Mmmm, that’s good!” However, if they don’t like it, thank them for trying and then let them eat whatever else has been served alongside and ignore the situation.

Another great idea is to keep the lower shelf of the fridge stocked with fruit, yogurt, and vegetable snacks so they can help themselves if they get hungry later.

3) You try to control their eating too much.

Solution: Nothing will bring up revolt quicker than a parent insisting a plate be finished. If you worry over every bite your child eats he/she will become a fussy eater. Remember: children want control over their lives. They quickly figure out that food is one area they can gain that control. Makes sense, right? If you don’t make a huge issue out of their food decisions, they won’t either.

4) Your kids aren’t open to trying new things or they will only eat “white” or “green” things.

Solution: Get your kids involved in cooking. When kids are active participants in the cooking of their food, they become more interested and excited about it. There is an incentive to try new things! What often happens is that kids will end up trying something they’ve often refused just because they were not being asked, told or forced to eat it.

I strongly believe that family meals should be for communicating and enjoying. Let’s offer healthy food, taking into consideration our children’s likes, and then let the rest of the meal flow.

How do you deal with the picky eaters in your life? Tell us in the comments below!

Erin Kurt, B.Ed, spent 16 years as a teacher and nanny around the world. Now, she applies her expertise as a parenting expert and author of Juggling Family Life. You can learn more about Erin and her simple, loving parenting method, and subscribe to her weekly parenting tips e-zine at ErinParenting.com.

At some point in their lives, a lot of people will ask themselves whether they should get an MBA. The reason for this may be any of the following:

• They may be working for a small company or a large corporation and they’re looking for ways to become a greater asset for their employer and increase their chances of getting promoted.
• They have a business idea and they want to strike out on their own, but their lack of business knowledge is holding them back.
• They have a lot of technical experience and they want to know more about the business aspects of their work.

If you’re in any of these situations, you should be aware that going the traditional MBA route is not your only option. According to Josh Kaufman, owner of the blog, “The Personal MBA”, and author of the bestselling book of the same name, you can get a do-it-yourself MBA. Josh explains in The Personal MBA Manifesto that the process consists of the following:

• Read the best business books out there.
• Learn as much as you can from these books.
• Discuss what you learn with others.
• Go out into the real world and make great things happen.

There’s much more on getting a do-it-yourself MBA below.

Weighing the Pros and Cons of Getting An MBA

Should you start looking into the GMAT and send away for business school brochures? Or should you embark on a self-study course of action? The first step in deciding whether or not to get an MBA is to brainstorm a list of pros, as well as a list of cons.

Here are some of the things in favor of getting an MBA:

• An MBA from a good business school is a status symbol.
• If you’re in a top 15 MBA program you’ll have access to recruiters from Fortune 50 companies, consulting firms, and investment banks.
• In this competitive market place, having an MBA could differentiate you from other candidates who don’t have one.
• In an MBA program you get to network with the potential future leaders of the business world.
• Many argue that the real value of an MBA is the discussion in the classroom: that is, learning from your classmates.
• If you’re in an MBA program you’ll have access to the school’s alumni association, which can mean job leads and other business opportunities.
• Some people consider that, today, not having an advanced degree is the equivalent of what not having a college degree was a decade ago.

Some of the reasons not to get an MBA are the following:

• MBAs are very expensive–upwards of $80,000 in tuition–and a lot of people pay for an MBA with debt. This means that it will take you several years just to break even.
• You’re taking two years off from work. This means you won’t be earning a salary, and you may be missing out on valuable work experience.
• While you’re paying back your tuition debt you’re basically an indentured servant: you can’t leave your job, even if you hate it and the hours are ridiculous, because you have loans to pay.
• Although having an MBA may give you a leg up in the job market, it doesn’t guarantee that you’ll get a high-paying job.
• There’s the opportunity cost of all the other things you could have been doing with your time instead of sitting in a classroom gorging on case studies and listening to lectures.
• A lot of the things that you learn in an MBA program are outdated.
• While one of the best ways to learn is by doing, an MBA program is mostly just learning theory.

It’s up to each individual to weigh the pros and cons for themselves and apply the results to their own situation. But, in general, if all you want is to learn the stuff that you’ll need in order to do well in business, you’ll probably be better off by getting a library card and embarking on a self-study program.

How to Get a Do-It-Yourself MBA

If you decide to get a do-it-yourself MBA, or at least look further into the possibility, you should do the following:

1. Read Kaufman’s book, “The Personal MBA”, in order to master the fundamental principles of sound business practice. Kaufman calls these principles, mental models, and he lays out 226 of these mental models in his book. With “The Personal MBA” you’re going to acquire a solid core of principles to work from, and then, later, you’re going to refer to other books in order to build upon that knowledge.

“The Personal MBA” covers the following three areas:

• How Businesses Work: You’ll learn about the five business processes which are at the core of any business. These are value creation, marketing, sales, value delivery, and finance.
• How People Work: A business is created by people to service people. It’s therefore important to understand how people make decisions and communicate with others.
• How Systems Work: Businesses are complex systems with many moving parts, and you should understand how complex systems work.

This book won’t give you all the answers. What it will do is give you the knowledge that you need in order to ask the right questions. Then, by asking the right questions, you can gather more information.

2. If there’s a particular topic that you want to know more about, refer to the books that Kaufman recommends in “The Personal MBA”, as well as the recommended reading list which is posted on his blog (The 99 Best Business Books). Choose 2 or 3 of these books in order to learn more about the particular area or skill that you’re interested in.

3. Look through the speed reading books and courses that are available (I recommend PhotoReading), and choose one that appeals to you. Obviously, this is so that you can get through the material quickly. Also, get the classic “How to Read a Book” by Mortimer J. Adler, which will show you how to read analytically and syntopically.

4. Create a mind map and/or summary of everything that you read as part of your personal MBA program. Make sure that you include your own opinions, interpretations, and conclusions in your summary. Come up with a plan of action based on what you’ve read.

5. Discuss your conclusions with others.

6. Apply your newly acquired knowledge in the real world. Anything that you do will have an effect; that is, it will generate feedback. By acting you’ll either have more information on what works, or you’ll have more information on what doesn’t work.

7. Once you’ve acted and received feedback, you need to analyze the results that you got. Ask yourself questions such as the following:

• What worked?
• What didn’t work?
• What could be improved?
• What needs to be done differently?

8. Based on your analysis of the feedback, decide how you need to modify your approach.

9. Act once again.

10. Keep going through this cycle–plan, act, analyze the feedback, and modify your approach–until you’ve reached the desired outcome, or until you’re happy with the results.

11. Then, move on to the next topic that interests you, and do the same thing all over again.

Conclusion

Kaufman uses quotes throughout his book to help illustrate the different points that he makes. One of the quotes he uses is the following by Jack Welch, the former Chairman and CEO of General Electric: “People always overestimate how complex business is. This isn’t rocket science–we’ve chosen one of the world’s most simple professions.”

A lot of people who have never been to business school are intimidated by business. However, as Welch points out, business is not rocket science. Go ahead and give it a shot: embark on the journey toward getting your own personal MBA.

(The Personal MBA is courtesy of Bego).